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February 2010 Number 95

 

 

In this issue:

·        Chick Flicks and Guy Movies

·        Fiction for Men: Edward

 

Chick Flicks and Guy Movies

Nick Waters, a young guy in Oklahoma, agreed to watch 30 days of chick flicks in 30 days with his wife and discover, with his wife's help and interpretations, what made women tick. He concluded that "any real relationship is based on forgiveness, compassion and vulnerability." Films, all chosen from 2007 or later, were based on suggestions from friends and posters to his website. The final list was:

 

1. Atonement

2. My Life In Ruins

3. Whip It

4. Georgia Rule

5. It’s Complicated

6. Leap Year

7. Mamma Mia!

8. Bright Star

9. The Secret Life of Bees

10. 27 Dresses

11. The Women

12. (500) Days of Summer

13. Cairo Time

14. I Could Never Be Your Woman

15. Sex & The City

16. Waitress

17. Couples Retreat

18. Labor Pains

19. Music and Lyrics

20. Becoming Jane

21. The Other End Of The Line

22. The Accidental Husband

23. The Time Traveler’s Wife

24. Dear John

25. Nights In Rodanthe

26. Australia

27. Made of Honor

28. Evening

29. Valentine’s Day

30. The Ramen Girl

 

You can read about Nick's adventures at his website, http://30chickflicks.com/.

 

Some men have suggested that Nick's wife, Nicci, should agree to watch 30 action flicks in 30 days. But I don't think that most action movies per se give us more than a cartoonish idea of what men are like. Yes, some action movies may be revealing or instructive about what makes men tick, but the category is too narrow. I'd include buddy movies plus anything else that reveals men's psyches. And I wouldn't limit the field to films from 2007 to today. Why leave out the really good old films?

 

Here, for instance, are some films I recommended in this space back in 2002 in a list called "Mentoring at the Movies":

 

Finding Forrester

The Cider House Rules

Good Will Hunting

November Sky

Dead Poets Society

Shawshank Redemption

The Color of Money

Star Wars: The Empire Strikes Back

Slam

The Man without a Face

The Tic Code

Training Day

 

Some of them are action movies; some, like "Training Day," are quite violent. But they all involve men relating to each other or to women or to the rest of society in rich, sometimes unpredictable ways. Here are a few more recent films I've thought of:

 

Avatar (of course)

Any of the "Oceans" films

Up in the Air

Star Trek (2009)

Iron Man

Milk

Il Postino

Duplicity

The Soloist

Charlie Wilson's War

The Terminal

Road to Perdition

The Green Mile

Philadelphia

Cast Away

 

Uh, I seem to be on a Tom Hanks jag.

 

Well, you get the idea. Many movies about men show us not only as heroes or superheroes but also struggling with and occasionally triumphing over doubt, fear, reversals, and feelings of inadequacy.

 

But I want your ideas. What movies would you sit Nicci down and make her watch for 30 days? Not to punish her for her stunt with Nick, but to explore what you want women, or society in general, to know about us by watching movies about men?

 

If I get enough responses, I'll post a list. Send your ideas to menletter@aol.com.

 

Bonus question: Have you seen any of the Chick Flicks listed above? What did you think? Try to be brief, or at least pithy.  

Fiction  for Men

Edward

After Antonio Machado

 

It was almost the end of the school day, a cold and gray winter afternoon with rain drumming steadily against the windowpanes. The only color in the room was a stain of red on a poster - a pool of carmine blood in which Abel lay while Cain fled the scene.

 

Edward shivered at the back of the room, far from the feeble heat of the kerosene heater.

 

The winter storm needed no thunder. That was supplied by Mr. Alvarez, an old man whose loud, hollow voice overwhelmed the monotonous drumming of the rain. A lifetime of teaching had sucked him dry, and his old gray suit hung on him like the raiment of a scarecrow.

 

Mr. Alvarez cradled an open book in one hand; the other he held up like a choirmaster as he directed his chorus of students reciting the multiplication table. He had reserved this time of day for group recitation because it was the only activity that held the class together as the children became restless and eager to go home.

 

Mr. Alvarez clapped the book shut. He dismissed the students and turned off the heater.

 

Edward, dripping rain, returned to the classroom fifteen minutes later. Still shivering, he tip-toed to the front of the room. Avoiding the stricken look on Abel's face, he stared intently up at Cain and tried to read the guilt and defiance on it. Then he got a chair and dragged it with scraping protest to the wall. He mounted the chair, reached behind one edge of the poster, and pulled. The tape gave way at the top, taking bits of paint and plaster with it. He pulled harder and almost fell off the chair when the poster ripped away from the wall, leaving three pieces of tape with white corners of paper sticking out underneath them.

 

Sitting in the chair with the poster on his lap, Edward started at one torn-off corner and began to reduce the lesson of Cain and Abel to small shreds. Soon the whole thing lay in tiny pieces on the floor.

 

Suddenly Edward felt a sharp pain in his left ear. The pain came from a powerful pinch. Attached to the pinch was Mr. Alvarez.

 

"Just what do you think you're doing?"

 

Edward didn't answer.

 

"Clean up those scraps of paper and put them on my desk. Sit down while I make a telephone call." He went next door to the pay phone at the bodega.

 

Edward's parents arrived, stamping the mud off their boots but still tracking much of the courtyard to the front of the room.

 

"Look what your son did," thundered Mr. Alvarez, pointing to the pile of paper on his desk and to the corners of paper still stuck to the wall. "A perfectly good biblical poster."

 

Edward's father knelt down to face his son at eye level. "Why did you do this?"

 

There was only the monotonous sound of rain.

 

"Why?" The word was repeated three times, each time louder and closer until father and son were nose to nose.

 

Tears started mingling with snot at the corners of the boy's mouth, providing lubrication to free it to speak but not smoothing out the interruptions of his sobs.

 

"I didn't ... want ... to see ... that ... picture anymore. Every ... time ... I saw Cain ... and Abel ... it was ... me and ... Fran- ... cis all over ... again. Cain ... killed ... his brother ... and so ... so did ... I."

 

Edward's parents were astonished. Edward had loved and idolized his older brother -  though sometimes also despising him - for being older, stronger, and bolder. Since Francis had died, Edward had become the perfect child, doing his chores and homework without being nagged, looking after his little sister, never complaining. Only at night did he give in to crying in his bed. His parents, traveling the labyrinth of their own grief, could not help him.

 

Edward composed himself, and for the first time since Francis's death he told the whole story. He and Francis had been playing Double Dare by a huge tree on the Garzas property. Edward's last Double Dare was for Francis to climb to the very top of the tree. Francis, always game, tried to climb as fast as he could. He reached the weakest branches before knowing it, and he came tumbling down. He hit his head on a jagged rock. As the carmine stain spread into the sand, Edward panicked. He ran away and hid for an hour before going home for help. Ran away. Like Cain.

 

Mr. Alvarez stood the boy up. He put one nicotine-stained hand on either side of the boy's head and pushed the tears off the boy's cheeks with his broad thumbs.

 

"Edward," he said, the thunder gone from his voice, "I know this event. Everybody does. The broken branches. The rock. Francis died instantly, even before you ran away. You did not kill him. You could not save him. You both were playing a stupid game, like almost all childhood games. It went horribly, horribly wrong. It is very sad for everyone. You made the dare. But Francis chose to climb the tree. It was a terrible accident. But it was an accident."

 

To Edward's parents: "Take this boy home. I have other posters. Do not punish him."

 

When Edward returned to school two days later, there was a new poster. It showed Jesus in a grove of trees, surrounded by children.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Childhood memory

Antonio Machado (tr. by Tim Baehr)

 

A cold, gray winter afternoon.

Schoolchildren are studying.

Monotony of rain

Drumming the windowpanes.

 

It is the classroom. A poster

Shows Cain fleeing,

And Abel dead

Next to a carmine stain.

 

With a loud, hollow tone

The teacher thunders - an old man,

Poorly dressed, sucked dry,

Holding a book in his hand.

 

And the whole children's choir

Goes on singing the lesson:

A thousand times a hundred, a hundred thousand,

A thousand times a thousand, a million.

 

A cold, gray winter afternoon.

Schoolchildren are studying.

Monotony of rain

Drumming the windowpanes.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

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