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February
2010 Number 95
In this issue:·
Chick Flicks and Guy Movies ·
Fiction for Men: Edward Chick Flicks and Guy MoviesNick Waters, a young
guy in Oklahoma, agreed to watch 30 days of chick flicks in 30 days with his
wife and discover, with his wife's help and interpretations, what made women
tick. He concluded that "any real relationship is based on forgiveness,
compassion and vulnerability." Films, all chosen from 2007 or later,
were based on suggestions from friends and posters to his website. The final
list was: 1. Atonement 2. My Life In Ruins 3. Whip It 4. Georgia Rule 5. It’s Complicated 6. Leap Year 7. Mamma Mia! 8. Bright Star 9. The Secret Life of Bees 10. 27 Dresses 11. The Women 12. (500) Days of Summer 13. 14. I Could Never Be Your Woman 15. Sex & The City 16. Waitress 17. Couples Retreat 18. Labor Pains 19. Music and Lyrics 20. Becoming Jane 21. The Other End Of The Line 22. The Accidental Husband 23. The Time Traveler’s Wife 24. Dear John 25. Nights In Rodanthe 26. 27. Made of Honor 28. Evening 29. Valentine’s Day 30. The Ramen Girl You can read about Nick's adventures at his website, http://30chickflicks.com/. Some men have suggested
that Nick's wife, Nicci, should agree to watch 30
action flicks in 30 days. But I don't think that most action movies per se
give us more than a cartoonish idea of what men are
like. Yes, some action movies may be revealing or instructive about what
makes men tick, but the category is too narrow. I'd include buddy movies plus
anything else that reveals men's psyches. And I wouldn't limit the field to
films from 2007 to today. Why leave out the really good old films? Here, for instance, are
some films I recommended in this space back in 2002 in a list called
"Mentoring at the Movies": Finding Forrester The Cider House Rules Good Will Hunting November Sky Dead Poets Society Shawshank Redemption The Color of Money Star Wars: The Empire Strikes Back Slam The Man without a Face The Tic Code Training Day Some of them are action movies; some, like "Training Day," are quite violent. But they all involve men relating to each other or to women or to the rest of society in rich, sometimes unpredictable ways. Here are a few more recent films I've thought of: Avatar (of course) Any of the "Oceans" films Up in the Air Star Trek (2009) Iron Man Milk Il Postino Duplicity The Soloist Charlie Wilson's War The Terminal Road to Perdition The Green Mile Cast Away Uh, I seem to be on a Tom Hanks jag. Well, you get the idea. Many movies about men show us not only as heroes or superheroes but also struggling with and occasionally triumphing over doubt, fear, reversals, and feelings of inadequacy. But I want your ideas. What movies would you sit Nicci down and make her watch for 30 days? Not to punish her for her stunt with Nick, but to explore what you want women, or society in general, to know about us by watching movies about men? If I get enough responses, I'll post a list. Send your ideas to
menletter@aol.com. Bonus question: Have you seen any of the Chick Flicks listed above? What did you think? Try to be brief, or at least pithy. Fiction for MenEdwardAfter Antonio Machado It was
almost the end of the school day, a cold and gray winter afternoon with rain
drumming steadily against the windowpanes. The only color in the room was a
stain of red on a poster - a pool of carmine blood in which Abel lay while
Cain fled the scene. Edward
shivered at the back of the room, far from the feeble heat of the kerosene
heater. The
winter storm needed no thunder. That was supplied by Mr. Alvarez, an old man
whose loud, hollow voice overwhelmed the monotonous drumming of the rain. A
lifetime of teaching had sucked him dry, and his old gray suit hung on him
like the raiment of a scarecrow. Mr.
Alvarez cradled an open book in one hand; the other he held up like a choirmaster
as he directed his chorus of students reciting the multiplication table. He
had reserved this time of day for group recitation because it was the only
activity that held the class together as the children became restless and
eager to go home. Mr.
Alvarez clapped the book shut. He dismissed the students and turned off the
heater. Edward,
dripping rain, returned to the classroom fifteen minutes later. Still
shivering, he tip-toed to the front of the room. Avoiding the stricken look
on Abel's face, he stared intently up at Cain and tried to read the guilt and
defiance on it. Then he got a chair and dragged it with scraping protest to
the wall. He mounted the chair, reached behind one edge of the poster, and
pulled. The tape gave way at the top, taking bits of paint and plaster with
it. He pulled harder and almost fell off the chair when the poster ripped
away from the wall, leaving three pieces of tape with white corners of paper
sticking out underneath them. Sitting
in the chair with the poster on his lap, Edward started at one torn-off
corner and began to reduce the lesson of Cain and Abel to small shreds. Soon
the whole thing lay in tiny pieces on the floor. Suddenly
Edward felt a sharp pain in his left ear. The pain came from a powerful pinch.
Attached to the pinch was Mr. Alvarez. "Just
what do you think you're doing?" Edward
didn't answer. "Clean
up those scraps of paper and put them on my desk. Sit down while I make a
telephone call." He went next door to the pay phone at the bodega. Edward's
parents arrived, stamping the mud off their boots but still tracking much of
the courtyard to the front of the room. "Look
what your son did," thundered Mr. Alvarez, pointing to the pile of paper
on his desk and to the corners of paper still stuck to the wall. "A
perfectly good biblical poster." Edward's
father knelt down to face his son at eye level. "Why did you do
this?" There
was only the monotonous sound of rain. "Why?"
The word was repeated three times, each time louder and closer until father
and son were nose to nose. Tears
started mingling with snot at the corners of the boy's mouth, providing
lubrication to free it to speak but not smoothing out the interruptions of
his sobs. "I
didn't ... want ... to see ... that ... picture anymore. Every ... time ... I
saw Cain ... and Abel ... it was ... me and ... Fran- ... cis
all over ... again. Cain ... killed ... his brother ... and so ... so did ...
I." Edward's
parents were astonished. Edward had loved and idolized his older brother
- though sometimes also despising him
- for being older, stronger, and bolder. Since Francis had died, Edward had
become the perfect child, doing his chores and homework without being nagged,
looking after his little sister, never complaining. Only at night did he give
in to crying in his bed. His parents, traveling the labyrinth of their own
grief, could not help him. Edward
composed himself, and for the first time since Francis's death he told the
whole story. He and Francis had been playing Double Dare by a huge tree on
the Garzas property. Edward's last Double Dare was
for Francis to climb to the very top of the tree. Francis, always game, tried
to climb as fast as he could. He reached the weakest branches before knowing
it, and he came tumbling down. He hit his head on a jagged rock. As the
carmine stain spread into the sand, Edward panicked. He ran away and hid for
an hour before going home for help. Ran away. Like Cain. Mr.
Alvarez stood the boy up. He put one nicotine-stained hand on either side of
the boy's head and pushed the tears off the boy's cheeks with his broad
thumbs. "Edward,"
he said, the thunder gone from his voice, "I know this event. Everybody
does. The broken branches. The rock. Francis died instantly, even before you
ran away. You did not kill him. You could not save him. You both were playing
a stupid game, like almost all childhood games. It went horribly, horribly
wrong. It is very sad for everyone. You made the dare. But Francis chose to
climb the tree. It was a terrible accident. But it was an accident." To
Edward's parents: "Take this boy home. I have other posters. Do not
punish him." When
Edward returned to school two days later, there was a new poster. It showed
Jesus in a grove of trees, surrounded by children. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Childhood memoryAntonio
Machado (tr. by Tim Baehr) A cold,
gray winter afternoon. Schoolchildren
are studying. Monotony
of rain Drumming
the windowpanes. It is
the classroom. A poster Shows
Cain fleeing, And
Abel dead Next to
a carmine stain. With a
loud, hollow tone The
teacher thunders - an old man, Poorly
dressed, sucked dry, Holding
a book in his hand. And the
whole children's choir Goes on
singing the lesson: A thousand
times a hundred, a hundred thousand, A
thousand times a thousand, a million. A cold,
gray winter afternoon. Schoolchildren
are studying. Monotony
of rain Drumming
the windowpanes. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ © Copyright 2010 by Tim Baehr. All Rights Reserved. |